Category: Uncategorized

1/9/15

The first day of spring. And it’s pouring down! It’s been a while since my last post, but I have not forgotten about my blog in that time. I have been taking notice of things so that I could give a good report when the time came.

I’ve been seeing taking a tonic from my medial herbalist for the last 2.5 months and without the word of a lie I am feeling really good health wise with more energy, plus generally speaking the symptoms of the god-awful endometriosis have reduced, sometimes significantly which is delightful and money well spent! And I have felt generally happier too overall.

I took on board her advice about reducing my caffeine intake, and now have less caffeine too per day, often none, at the most 2. Instead I drink yummy rooibos tea, which is a non-caffeine hot drink, very nice and you have milk with it so easily passes for a ‘normal’ cuppa. Caffeine and grog both stimulate the adrenal glands and make the body systems stress, so by reducing that intake I am feeling the benefits (believe me).  I’ve been grazing on the protein a lot too at the advice of my herbalist. Things have definitely improved for me health wise in mind and body – as we all know the two are interconnected.

I was just reading about serotonin and the impact that diet has on our moods, I’ve never really been too disciplined with what I eat before, aside from being a relatively healthy eater. Sure, I know about fish and nuts and seeds and green vege and all that, but with the improvements I’ve actually felt in the last 6 weeks with my protein-filled diet, I am more inclined to experiment to see what else can bring improvement. I shall stay in consult with my herbalist on that.

I’ve got my half marathon in 2 weeks’ time, did a 2 hour run on Saturday and felt pretty good. I’ve been training steadily for the last 2months plus, will need new sneakers after it!  So yes, 2 weeks from now my race will have been run. I’m looking forward to it and the accomplishment of having completed it!

We’ve been running a course at the Buddhist Centre for the last 5 weeks called ‘Buddhism for Ordinary People’ and it has been a lovely programme. We have covered some of the main elements of what the Buddha taught, mindfulness; loving kindness and the 10 ways in which we can train ourselves to live more honourable lives (they’re called ‘Virtuous Actions’). We’ve had a great bunch of new students join in, each with their own reasons for joining . The Buddha’s teachings are so robust and applicable to today’s world. Buddhism is the best thing I have ever come across and a wonderful guide in my life. Life is so much better with it, have been practising for about 7 years now, yeeha.

In a few weeks’ time our Tibetan Rinpoche returns to Nelson from Tibet to conduct some teachings on Bodhichitta which is a fundamental teaching on loving kindness. I will be going to see him, it is an honour to simply be in the same room as him, let alone receive teachings from him. If anyone is interested in coming along, have a look at Nelson Buddhist Centre website for details.

Over the last few months, I’ve planted some more native trees and shrubs and grasses in my back yard, the end result in my mind will be a lovely naturally enclosed area, allows all the sun to still shine through yet creates that ‘secret garden’ feeling. Being relatively new to gardening, I just hope that I have planned right and that the outcome is as good as my intention. Guess I need to be prepared for either really. I’ve got a dear pal who gardens a lot and she says that that is all part and parcel of gardening, you put things in the ground with the best intention but some of the time you’ve got to tweak, chop, trim and pull out if the outcome isn’t as planned and your plants fail to thrive or on the other hand go berserk. At any rate, I’m happy to have got started at least, the natives will bring in more birds and bees and my next planting plan is for my vege and flower garden.   Oh yes, to create something that is manageable for me and brings in new growth and life will be just the ticket!

Here’s to good health and happy days. Tiff

Explore the brighter side of winter June 30 2015 There’s a lot to love about winter – crisp blue skies, warming up in front of the fire, and socialising over hot drinks. But with these seasonal highlights come challenges. As the temperature drops and the days get shorter, we often notice a change in our energy levels, mood, sleeping patterns and eating habits. Curling up on the couch with comfort food and a good book becomes more appealing than facing the outdoors to exercise.

Explore the brighter side of winter Do you find it difficult to eat well, maintain a healthy weight and stick to health and wellness goals over the winter months?

Here are 10 tips to help keep you fit, nourished and warm this season.

1. Warm your insides

Porridge makes a simple, warming breakfast on cold mornings. Boost the flavour and nutrition by adding spices (cinnamon, mixed spice or ginger), chopped nuts and fruit (fresh, canned or dried).

2. Brighten your day

Fruit and vegetables are packed with vitamins, minerals and antioxidants for good health. Eating them can help you manage your body weight because you fill up on foods that have fewer calories. Add to your shopping basket seasonal produce such as leeks, fennel, brussel sprouts, turnips, yams, watercress, rhubarb, mandarins, kiwifruit and oranges.

3. Experiment with a slow cooker

After a busy day at work, there’s nothing better than coming home to a hot, homemade meal. Less time in the kitchen means more time for friends, family or physical activity.

4. Plan ahead

Set aside time to plan your meals and the weekly grocery shop. It will save you time, money and from unforeseen visits to the takeaway store.

5. Cook in bulk

Casseroles, stews and soups are winter classics that can be prepared in bulk. Include plenty of vegetables, lean meat and/or legumes. Leftover portions make an easy lunch or can be frozen for another night’s meal.

6. Enjoy exercise

Do you prefer training as part of a team or individually, indoors or outdoors? Find an activity that you enjoy, that suits your budget and fits with your schedule. Keep an eye out for activities offered in your community or workplace.

7. Keep moving, every day

Even small amounts of physical activity will pay off. This includes walking to work or taking the stairs. Regular exercise helps lift our mood and control weight.

8. Boost your vitamin D

Vitamin D plays an important role in bone health and immune function. Over winter when we spend less time outdoors, New Zealanders may not be getting enough. To help ensure your levels are adequate, pop outside for a walk in the sun around midday. Try including food sources of vitamin D in your diet (e.g. oily fish, milk and milk products, eggs and fortified margarine spreads).

9. Avoid hibernation

When it’s gloomy outside, it can be tempting to work longer hours or stay rugged up at home. For many of us, socialising is a powerful way to reduce stress and feel good.

10. Sleep well

Getting a good night’s sleep is essential for health and wellbeing. Lack of sleep can make us feel rundown. You may also find it difficult to concentrate and make decisions. Establish an evening routine, relax and allow your body to recharge for the following day

 

           5/7/15

Just had a dear friend stay the weekend, we had a great time.  You can’t beat friendship, count your blessings to have great people in your life, appreciate what you’ve got when you’ve got it, it’s too late when it’s gone.

I’ve had a good couple of weeks really.  Since I saw the medical herbalist I have changed my diet by upping the amount of protein I eat a lot as my diet was really deficient.  I’ve also reduced my caffeine and alcohol intake down to minimum which I’ve been working on anyway with the alcohol for a few years already and coffee reduction is surprisingly easy so far.  She made me up a tonic ‘specially for me and has prescribed strong vitamin c with pro-flavanol, very potent.  I take both twice a day right now.

All I can say is that her treatment has noticeably improved some areas of my health!  Some of you will know that I’ve had ongoing stage 4 endometriosis and recurring anaemia for more than 20 years which has been a problem for me.  Well, in a short time the symptoms of the endometriosis have reduced in ways that amaze me!  My mind set feels better over all too.

After my 2 hour initial consultation (!) she said she thought i’d been operating pretty unwell for all those years and (I quote) “her job is to help me get well”. Doctors are there to get us better.  She and others in her field are there to keep us well.  I like that.

I’m now on a higher protein diet and it appears to be helping things improve.  Reducing the caffeine and alcohol will be a big help as those two critters (among other things) stimulate the adrenal glands which release some unhelpful chemicals into our system, some of which inhibit our body’s ability to take up the nutrients and goodness that make us tick well.  Not a good thing if you’re already unwell.

I would love to see this blog morph into something that is helpful for others and where proactive peeps can share.

I’ve got to a place in my life where I really just want to be myself in the world (I so like that!).  There is a lovely song i’m listening to at the moment often, its called Let it Go.  I’ll be me (thank you James Bay).

Love Tiff

20/6/15                                                                             

Greetings.  I went to see the Medical Herbalist a few days ago, the one I spoke of in an earlier blog.  After a two hour appointment, I walked out with a tonic specifically made for me and a prescription only high dose Vitamin C with bioflavanol.  In summary, the Herbalist told me that my diet was deficient in protein and explained what that repercussions of that underneath my skin are.  It is easy to see that what has troubled me for decades may in fact be linked in part at least to my diet, ‘we are what we eat’ has a lot of merit.

For the next 6 months she wants me to eat at least 50g of protein with every meal and she also asked me to cut out alcohol and reduce coffee to a minimum.  One of the things that both do is stimulate and stress the adrenal system and this inhibits the uptake of vitamins and minerals.  So I’ve taken up the challenge, after all… it was my choice to go and see her and spend the money, so it would be a waste of money to now negate her professional wellness advice.  I am on this mission for 6 months and will reassess over-all then.  It’s not easy to just ‘drop’ a habit like coffee and alcohol, so I will watch this space myself with interest.

At the Buddhist Centre on Wednesday night we studied and talked about a particular teaching that revolves around the antidote to anger and aversion.  Anger in this context doesn’t mean full blown outburst where you yell and scream or speak loudly “I’m so angry”, it is more about the many little subtle regular thoughts that are untrained minds are subjected to “damn, I forgot to buy the milk” or “hurry up!!!” (to the slow driver in front of us), or just before when I went to turn my laptop on and it was completely flat battery “damn!”.  These little thoughts on their own may seem harmless enough but added up, may amount to a big lot of dissatisfaction, which we usually don’t like so we work our little butts off to get back to a feeling that we do like (we want to ‘get rid of’ the feeling unsatisfied all the time) and so the problem with attachment goes on and on… ‘I only want to feel good, I don’t want to feel bad’.  From a Buddhist perspective, this is one of the root causes of our suffering…

I’ve had good days (there goes the subtle judgement again) since last post.  I have felt more enthused than I have in a long while, feeling even upbeat sometimes (yeeha).  I am glad I am feeling more refreshed since I came through the difficult times a few weeks ago.  I am most happy about the fact I got through by turning my mind towards the things I know that work and by resting up and relaxing.  I have got some more days off soon from work to fully charge up, plus I’ve got some native plants to plant!

I went for dinner at a friend’s house last night then we went to a pub with the singles group I sometimes go to.  It’s not really my thing anymore, the old pub scene, however it doesn’t hurt to make an effort and put yourself out there sometimes.  It does open life up a bit more and adds to social connection.  There were about 25 of in the group and I chatted with several, some old friends and some I just met last night.  I got home about 10pm (go me!) and even though my social scene has changed so much in recent years (we didn’t used to go OUT until 10pm sometimes!) I am happy (yes I said happy) where I’m at.  It can be pretty tempting to stay in your comfort zone and while I am in love with my comfort zone, I do also go outside it on purpose sometimes because I want to make sure that I can… you never know when life will bring things in that will bring on discomfort, so knowing you’ll be okay ‘even if’ is a good strategy aye.

This weekend I’m off to a Marae to sleepover.  I am studying Te Reo this year at night class.  Since my teenage years, I have always felt a connection with the Maori culture and I’ve always enjoyed being around when the guitars are brought out and the spiritual side of the culture.  So tonight me and my classmates are off to be taught formally about the protocols and why things are done as they are on a Marae.  I will recap my experiences afterwards.  Ka kite ano.

Tiff

14/6/15

I’m feeling really good since I decided to make and share this blog.  These last few days I’ve been happier than I have been in a long time.  I don’t exactly know why that is, there’s nothing specifically changed or happened, it has probably got something to do with my new resolve.  The fact I’ve ‘gone public’ and shared it means I really need to keep it up, I would be embarrassed if I stopped now.

The most poignant thing that I have to share today is that no matter what is going on around you, whether you’re happy, sad, elated, miserable, excited or bored… keep a watch on your mind.  Not in a stressed out, micro-managey type way, but in a relaxed, non-judgey almost third-person type of way.  Our Tibetan Rinpoche often reminds us to let the waters of our mind’s settle, “don’t stir up the water”…  observe and let the thoughts just be the thoughts, don’t buy into them, it will usually just make things harder and increase angst.

It is a good thing for our own well-being to get in the habit of reviewing the types of thoughts that are going through our minds regularly or it is likely they may lead you astray and interfere with your peace.  Attachment, confusion, negativity, envy, stress etc etc…

The Buddha taught it is possible to train our minds so that no matter what is going on for and around us, we have a strong and stable mind, one that doesn’t buy into drama and distress.  Working with my mind is really one of the best things I have ever done.  By giving it quiet time (fancy word = meditation) and space to process it can perform at a level where more positive thoughts come than negative ones.  I meditate and allow my mind to slow down often and this has truly reduced my stress levels and suffering over the years and helped me to manage upsets better.  I’m absolutely sure of that.

Today I went to the markets and I felt great, the sun was shining, I was buying coffee and scones and I browsed and I saw a friend and we had a wee yarn and a laugh and I thought to myself ‘this is great, I feel really great’, and simultaneously I also realised that moment would pass and soon be gone.  I hope no-one finds that morbid, it is not at all intended to sound that way.  In actual fact, having that simultaneous thought helps keep a clearer perspective.

I have been going to Nelson Buddhist Centre for over 5 years now, and while I’m still on a learning curve, I feel about the best I have really.  Sure, i’ve had crap and difficult times here and there, Buddhism has provided me with the best tools for the job though and there has never been a problem that couldn’t be solved or a question that couldn’t be answered and I have certainly asked a few.  For a sensitive and analytical person like me, i’m so glad for it.  Without it, I really suspect that I would get lost at sea when storms come.

No matter what a person’s belief or faith or view point, I think it is true to say that everybody is seeking happiness (or if not, at least reduction of their suffering) on some level.

Tiff

 

12/6/15

I have noticed some little differences in myself since committing to my happiness.  My mind’s-eye is keener, I have caught myself a couple of times feeling a bit down in the mouth, heavy in the belly and I have made conscious effort to get myself away from there, to rephrase my thought or look for a better feeling.  It’s sort of like having a goal keeper on alert to fend off negativity.

Yesterday I went for my first run in about 2 weeks.  It was just for 30 minutes but it was enough to get out in the winter sun and get the endorphins going and blood pumping all around my body.  A thought crossed my mind while I was running in regards to the bit I wrote about ‘not having felt happy for a long time’ and that thought was ‘perhaps I could lower the bar of my expectations’… relax up some more and actively try and let more fun and enjoyment into my life NOW.  I thought that was a good idea.  So I’m trying that.  From now.  Gulp.

I talked at different times with various female friends yesterday about how the last month had been and how I just didn’t want to go on nursing my life that way.  I had got to a point where I had had enough of it.  I had persevered through that stormy month with as much diligence and determination as I could muster, reached out as I needed and had battened down the hatches and gone with it.  In response, my various friends told me they too know the struggles, whether caused by hormonal, seasonal, lifestyle or chemical reasons, they too go through their own stormy waters.  Actually, we all do in our own ways.

There is a thing about sharing that leads to connection between people and that is one reason I am doing this blog for.  If just one person benefits from what is posted here, then it is worthwhile.  And if that one person happens to be me, then that too is awesome.  If you are reading this, please share too if anything comes to mind, this is set up to be a proactive forum generally around the subject of happiness and what it takes to be that.

My Buddhist name given to me by our Tibetan Rinpoche happens to translate to ‘Joyful Perseverance’, he gave me that name 3 years ago and I believed then as I do now it is apt for me.  I’ve always been good at persevering, just the joyful bit wasn’t always there.   I am trying with all my might to drop the negativity malarkey and pick up the happiness gem.  It takes mind training.  Thank Buddha for Buddha I say!

Next week I have booked an appointment with a Medical Herbalist, she has been recommended to me by a friend and I am going with an open mind.  My friend recommends this particular Herbalist as she has been most helpful for helping her with her Endometriosis.  I have experienced massive issues with Endometriosis for more than 20 years, only in the last 4 years have these been diagnosed and addressed.  Before it was diagnosed it was agony and it was hellish.

Last year I witnessed with my own eyes a transformation of someone I know who had a few physical ailments (trouble losing weight and had skin/hair issues), well after seeing a Herbalist for a comprehensive appointment, getting a tonic purpose made for her, those issues improved noticeably and dramatically and that friend was obviously feeling much better.  Who knows, maybe there are imbalances in me that this Herbalist will identify.

Here’s a nice quote I found on hope.  “I have come to accept the feeling of not knowing where I am going. And I have trained myself to love it. Because it is only when we are suspended in mid-air with no landing in sight, that we force our wings to unravel and alas begin our flight. And as we fly, we still may not know where we are going to. But the miracle is in the unfolding of the wings. You may not know where you’re going, but you know that so long as you spread your wings, the winds will carry you” C. Joybell C.

Best wishes

Tiffany

10/6/15

I am choosing to write a blog that will be the place where I can express myself as I learn how to be happy.  I have decided that it is time for me to be happy, even though I’m not even sure how to be that.  And I don’t know when the last time was that I had regular fun in a way that measured up to my expectations.  Somewhere along the line I seem to have put the kibosh on ‘fun’ and have opted for living a life that is more about satisfaction and comfort instead.  Sometimes I forget though and I can laugh out loud so my eyes wrinkle up and my cheeks are all podgy and my throat opens up and my belly laughs.  Those moments are gold.  Those are the moments I am going to try and cultivate from here. In the last 10 years or so, I have spent a lot of time on and off caring for what is labelled depression and all the things that go with that.  I think I must have unconsciously opted for the middle road of comfort as a result, because its easier there.

The last month or so I have been struggling, I can see it clearly now.  In the past I would say “I feel like I have got depression again”.  And I might look at increasing my very low dose of medication to cover it.  Little tell-tale signs, short tethered, impatient, lacking confidence, overly tired and un-enthused, consumed with little niggly issues, fuzzy head/logic.  Yep, in the past I’d probably say “I’ve got depression again” but over the last year or so I’ve reasoned that it is possible I can find another way to review these feelings, this state, that will get me through better.

I am Buddhist.  I have a strong interest in being true to myself.  Even though in Buddhism we believe there is no inherent ‘self’ in the ‘self’.  we are all made up of compounded factors (our skin, our blood, the oxygen that we breathe, our experiences, our conscious choices etc) there is nothing inherent about the self, it relies on all the elements of it’s human-being-ness to live and experience life.  There are so many practices from Tibetan Buddhists about mind training that help.  I am leaning on those practices more than I have before and seeing  how I go.

This blog is going to be a place where I can explore my efforts and my new emphasis towards being happy, I can share with myself and anyone else interested in my honest efforts.  I hope by putting it ‘online’ I will stay accountable and keep going this way.  It’s a little bit scary.  I would also love it if others post their experiences and stories and things they have found useful in their lives.  This is a blog for proactive living towards happiness and more joy.

Just yesterday I googled ‘Depression + Dalai Lama’ because I wanted to find out what His Holiness had to say about depression from the Buddhist perspective.  There weren’t many posts that matched my search so I put in another Google search ‘Happiness + Dalai Lama’ and guess what, there were heaps of posts.  So I spent the afternoon listening to teachings on Happiness.  I felt better for it.  Comforted.

I have a dear friend who is further ahead in his practice than I am, he is sort of like a teacher to me.  He reminds me often that I have a very real choice on how I’m going to use my mind, that any mind state is a ‘mind over mind’ really.  He reminds me with conviction that I am indeed inherently good (as we all are) and that if I only keep practising the Dharma and training my mind then I will eventually get to a place whereby this habit of mine of dwelling in difficulty when it arises will eventually be over-ruled and so much weakened that it will no longer create problems.

I want this to be a real account of my finding true happiness and joy in my life. After all, I am 42.  Isn’t that the answer to everything???  

End quote:  You can’t be happy and sad at the same time, it is not possible.  So choose to be happy.

Best wishes everyone.
TeVee